Peter posted this link in another thread about a guy who gave a Nikon F6 a one star rating because you would need to buy strange cartridges instead of regular CF cards. I did not want to hijack that thread but I wanted to tell you my three favorite Nikon Tech-Support stories.
This one happened before I started working there but I was told it is true. There was this man who turned in a Nikonos (for those who don't know: this was a submersible camera that did not need a housing for underwater photography). He had some water inside and wanted it to get checked. They did, found nothing but cleaned it and pressure tested it. About a week later he came back, again with water inside the camera. So he was asked what he was doing. They found out the water entered the camera because he was changing lenses - underwater!
I received this call personally, so I know it is true. A guy called with a Coolpix 4500 (nice camera back then!) complaining that it did not work properly. If he used the build in flash the images were totally black and if he didn't the autofocus would not work. I asked him what he was shooting and he told me that he loves to go down to the harbor at night to take pictures of the big container freight ships. I had to tell him that the build in flash was not strong enough to light up such a large ship and without the flash the exposure time was simply too long to hand-hold the camera.
Another call I got personally. Someone called with problems with his film scanner. We tried to talk him through the menus of the Nikon Scan Software but he kept telling me that his menus look different. I told him to download the most recent version of the software 3.x but he told me that he already got 4.x. So I asked him about his scanner model and it turned out to be a Canon film scanner. I asked him if he was aware that he called the Nikon Tech Support Hotline and he said: "Yes, I know. But your hotline does not charge anything whereas the Canon hotline costs money and I hoped it was something very basic that is independent of the manufacturer." - I loved that one!